Happy New Year everyone~ Hope everyone's starting off their new year with joy and rejuvenation. New Years for me this year was a bit sombering as I reflected on the hardships that occurred to the people of Ukraine. It was a joyful yet sorrowful moment as we watched a broadcast by the President of Ukraine speaking on the endurance and strength of the people. The song I wanted to share this blog is a Romanian song I discovered through a new friend I met here in Mediaș, Romania, my final destination before heading back to the States. The title translates to "I live for You" and talks about how because of Jesus' faithfulness and love for us we give our lives to Him in return. It's always so amazing to listen to different worship from different countries and still be able to see God's heart in them. This past month can be summarized by one word: injury. I learned how deep my trust in God went and learned to rely on Him even when I was scared of what would happen to my body.
"For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain." . Philippians 1:21
In Odesa we assisted an amazing ministry called New Life (https://nlm.help/) who were not only feeding over 500 refugees with food packages, but were also giving 24/7 shelter to the homeless. Our YWAM team had the opportunity to give out food packages, hand out Christmas shoe boxes to children during a Christmas program, and serve food to the homeless. I personally had a chance to assist in first aid to the homeless who came with various different wounds. Unfortunately during the week while distributing food packages to the Ukrainian refugees I injured my back. I had a weak back from previous injuries and this time was the worst. I could not sit, stand, or walk without feeling intense pain. At the hospital they said they could do nothing except give me symptomatic relief unless I got an MRI. As I rested the next day in bed and was reflecting with God, He confronted me with this challenging question: what is your faith worth? If God had asked to trust in Him for healing and to wait would I do it? Or would I try and fix myself through my own means here in Ukraine. That same evening, I attended a church service that spoke on that exact same topic. The pastor talked about Abraham's crazy faith to sacrifice his own son because God told him to trust in Him. I knew that I probably needed an MRI and a diagnosis because I started feeling weakness and tingling in my legs, but I also came to the conclusion that God brought me here and promised me safety and if it came to it I would give it all up for His kingdom. So I confessed my fears and doubts before God and trust in His providence that night and fell asleep. The next day, God rewarded my trust with healing. I could sit with minimal pain and could start to walk short distances without much pain. In the days that followed, I slowly started healing and I grew in my trust in God. Now, my back is still quite sensitive to harsh labor, but I know that God will give me the strength to finish strong and that He will provide complete healing once I return home.
"Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you." Matthew 7:7
When we came back from Odesa my prayer to God was that He would be able to give me work that would not require physical labor. Every week we had been in Ukraine there had been a need of some kind of physical labor, but to my surprise, the last week in Ukraine we were given no physically demanding ministries. I was overjoyed that I could participate in all of the ministries and I was so blessed to be able to show God's love to men in drug and alcohol rehabilitation centers, to sick children in hospitals, and non believing youth at a nearby village. My favorite moment of that week was playing guitar with one of the men in rehab when we did not know either of each others languages and still being able to worship. It was amazing to feel the Spirit move in two languages at once and to witness change in their lives as they put aside their past bondage to addiction and were seeking change through Jesus. So many of us struggle with addiction and it is so hard to break out of; I encourage anyone who feels trapped to reach out to friends or family and to God because when you ask, Jesus will respond!
As I left the Ukrainian border, I had a mix of very different emotions. The first week out, I felt so tired and fatigued. After speaking with the rest of my team, some of them felt similarly. We realized that the minute we entered Ukraine we had tensed up and were always alert even if we were safe; a month long of constant vigilance took its toll as we could finally relax and realize how tired we had become. I had also become very sensitive to reliving or remembering my friends' stories of how they came to Ternopil after the war started. Whenever someone in Romania asked me how Ukraine was I started to tear up and could not properly respond as it felt like I had somehow abandoned them as they were struggling and I was leaving them stranded. However, I brought this up to God and felt peace in that with my injury and the emotional state of our team, it was time for us to leave. As of this moment, I am still processing all of my time in Ukraine and I would love to return back to help in any way I can once I am physically able to again. The people and the country have left such a huge impact on my heart. The biggest prayer I had going into Ukraine was that God would show me His goodness in a place of darkness. He showed me in a month that God's goodness can shine through any darkness and will pierce through the hearts of hopelessness.
"He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength." . Isaiah 40: 29
Now in Mediaș, Romania we have had some time to unwind and take part in a ministry I have a large heart for: children's ministry! I had an opportunity to dance, do crafts, tell interactive Bible stories, and laugh along with Ukrainian children at a school, at local villages nearby with Roma children and youth, and with Roma children in our own neighborhood. Many of the children we interacted with do not have strong parental figures and many go about their day without any supervision. One example of this is that some children come asking for winter clothes every week because they come in short sleeves in the winter. Every week the YWAM base gives out some clothes to them, but several days later they throw the clothes out because they get dirty and do not know how to clean them since their parents are not around. In the last full week of ministry, I came down with a bad cold and as I was asking God whether I should take a day off to heal, He told me to push through and that He would provide the strength to finish strong. He reminded me of Solomon's regret in Ecclesiastes as he realized the importance of finishing strong. One day as I was in charge of leading children's worship in a village, I felt very weak, fatigued, and generally unwell; however, before we left we prayed that we would rely on Jesus' strength alone and as soon as I stepped up front, all my fatigue left me and I had so much joy in worshiping the Lord with the kids. The following Sunday, I was in charge of leading worship for the congregation, but the morning before we headed out I could barely sing as my lungs were very congested and I could not stop coughing all night. Once again, I relied on Jesus and not on my own strength and once again God was faithful. I did not cough once while worshipping and my voice (though strained) did not break until I finished. Currently, I am still struggling with sickness, but I know that I can rely on God to finish strong!
As this short season of my life is soon coming to a close, I hope that everyone back at home knows how much I miss and appreciate your prayers and presence. I look forward to coming back with a deeper love of God and His people. I am excited to share all that I have learned and I am praying that I continue to learn of God's unchanging character as I continue to grow.
Love,
Heymin
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